In Search of Quality

I think it's my age that brings me to this place.  One of questions, deep thought and self-evaluation.  I've been hungry for change for a some time now.  The first big change was starting a new job.  It's been a good change for me.  I feel like as a result I'm in a better place with my husband and kids.  I don't like my new job as much but the job I loved before doesn't exist anymore.  The end of an era for me and some days, I admit, I mourn it.  But I have to move forward.  It's what we have to do in life.

I'm hungry for change but more importantly, I'm craving quality.  Quality marriage, quality relationships with my kids and family, quality friendships, quality me.  I'm moving closer to letting go of things in the past that I allow to define my present.  I'm taking better care of myself physically and emotionally.  My husband and I are putting more effort into our relationship.  Often times, after 21 years together, comfort has taken the place of effort which always leads to ignored feelings and needs.

I also want quality friendships in my life.  I don't have a long list of friends.  And as scary as this is to admit, I have to wonder if some people I call friends value the friendship as much as I do.  I always try to look at myself and ask if I'm doing something wrong and there are a some things I could improve upon.  I'm guarded.  I don't like conflict.  I don't like being vulnerable.  All things that could complicate a friendship.

Another thing to consider is that some people will float in and out of your life.  Sometimes it's for a good reason.  Sometimes there's no explanation.  I have had friends who I've lost contact with but it wasn't because we ended on a bad note.  It was just because our lives took different turns.  Maybe we grew out of the relationship.  So I guess that's what I'm looking at now.  Seeing which friendships are still worth investing in and which ones just need to be gently let go of.  It's scary.  Thinking that you're the one that's hanging on tighter than the other.

Anitque Store Finds

Every once and a while we make an antique store run to see if anything strikes our fancy.  Our latest trip landed us these finds:

Pictures brought to you by my new phone!  It's been almost seven years since I last picked out a new cell phone.  My last one was a hand-me-down FROM MY DAUGHTER!!!  How does that happen?  She should be getting my hand-me-downs.  Ah well.  I'm in cell phone heaven and my family is tired of hearing about all the things that little handful of technology can do but too bad!  

Painting Birch

So my friend, Cindi, sent me an email and told me of this painting class.  You get to paint a picture and do some wine tasting.  SOLD!  This particular week they were going to paint birch trees.  BONUS!  WIN, WIN!

It was so relaxing and fun.  I would do it again in a heat beat.  Step out that box and try something new.

My Church

I don't go to church.  Have an opinion about that if you want.  My church is a quiet moment in nature a lot of times.  Sunrises, sunsets, northern lights, the lake, a trail in the woods.  Seeing those things and being near them lifts my spirits, makes me thankful for life, and clears my mind.

On Friday morning this week, this sunrise was my church.  With the great weather, I had wanted to catch a sunrise all week.  I was crabby and busy and thinking about a decision I would have to make soon.   By the end of Thursday I felt so frustrated, I decided to take Friday off to decompress.  After I dropped my son off at school, I saw that orange ball of fire coming up off the lake and knew God was calling me.  "Come to Jesus, girl."  I needed to be reminded that my life doesn't suck and things always work out.